I trust you had a great holiday weekend kicking off the Holiday Season.
A quick story…
It’s one I tell after every Thanksgiving because ever since it happened, it just feels relevant as people digest all the food they just ate.
About 7 years ago, a Ph.D education-level client of mine was very upset about how we had eaten recently and consulted me for advice. At the time, he had just eaten a Kit-Kat chocolate bar and proceeded to escalate the event into a very big story. He was driving himself a little crazy over it and in turn, anyone listening.
So I said, “Howard, all you did was eat a Kit-Kat.” That’s all that happened. “True or not?”
He said “true.”
“So why all these other stories?,” I asked.
It was a revelation to him at the time, that his ego was fully invested with all the stories generated from his past, which was full of similar experiences. So when he ate the Kit-Kat, it unleashed a tirade of ‘stuff.
Is it any wonder why people are doom ed to repeat the past? In this case, if it wasn’t enough that “what” he was eating was reinforcing food addiction making him virtually powerless around Kit-Kat’s; his eating patterns were also reinforced by an over-personalized ego-orientation, which is like living in your past and that’s why the past was repeating itself for Howard.
As a lifestyle coach and trainer, which includes but is not limited to a focus on eating nutrient-rich, I worked with him on no longer identifying with his story, and getting free of all that.
Which brings up the moral of this story…
If you really want to change your lifestyle, including how you eat, at some point you have to begin identifying with who you really are, and that is not ANYTHING that has happened in the past.
No aspect of your history is doomed to repeat itself unless you think that’s who you are. And if so, of course it will repeat. You’ve got to get free of all that in addition to learning how to eat “nutrient rich.”
So anytime you eat a ‘Kit-Kat’ so-to-speak, psychologically, you can stay well and acknowledge the fact that all you did was eat a Kit-Kat, nothing more. You won’t have to beat yourself up psychologically anymore, the way some people do, on anything from eating thew wrong thing to eating too much, even on Thanksgiving.
You also won’t have to worry about not paying attention to the times when you do, (thinking that unless you beat yourself up, you’ll do it again) because once you make the Switch to Nutrient Rich eating, your body will prevent you from doing so, so easily. It will let you know in no uncertain terms that it does not want what it doesn’t need and that’s the reason why healthy eaters are so “disciplined.” It just doesn’t feel good.
When that happens, and all the while you are feeling psychologically well, even in the face of a behavior that may not have been in your best interest; you will know you’ve made real progress.
Bottom line, if you are responding from the wrong part of your self, you will have difficulty with food behaviors. When you respond from the part of yourself that is authentic, and free of ego participation, you will respond accordingly.
You’ll get over stuff even with a little bit of healthy shame, real quick and continue moving forward making improvements in how you eat, think and live.